I go to the grocery store, on average, once a week, and most of those times I buy sliced ham from the deli counter. It works exactly the same as in the US except that they pretty much only have ham. I recently discovered turkey, but it's not always in stock.
This means that in the two years we've been living here, I've probably bought ham at least 50 times, and I've yet to get the same thing two times in a row. I always say the same thing:
"Quisiera un quarto de jamon de pavo."
I'd like a quarter (of a kilo) of turkey ham.
Sometimes I ask for "jamon de pierna", which is leg of ham, and sometimes I go crazy and request "jamon de pavo de pierna", but even with those variations, I've had way more than three different things end up in my cart.
A couple months ago the woman asked me if I wanted "pierna" (leg) or "pechuga" (breast), which really confused me because I'd never considered pork having breast meat. I think I told her pierna. The following week I repeated exactly what she'd said to me and I was given a completely different looking ham.
I usually assume they give me whatever is NOT on sale, but I'm sure they recognize me by now, so I'm not sure that's what's going on. Some days they slice from a really large, ovalish hunk of meat, other times the pieces are small and square -- about the size of a slice of bread. The turkey ham is lighter in color, but only when I buy it. The few times I've dragged Ibis along I make him get it so we'll actually get what he wants, but I can't seem to replicate the results.
I've just accepted that I'm going to get something every time, and I've turned it into a whacked-out game: What Kind of Ham Will We Get This Week?
I want to ask if you have similar experiences, but I'm doubting that's possible. Feel free to share any bizarre things that DO happen to you on a regular basis.