Thursday, August 7, 2008

Who Are the People in Your Neighborhood?

"Hola, güera!"

I hear this a lot. It's not offensive but it gets annoying. Let's look at the definitions:

Hola - hello, hi
güera - 1) blond, fair-haired; yellow; 2) blond or fair-haired man or woman

Why am I bringing this up? Because someone down the street yelled this at Ibis when he was driving home from work. Apparently they recognized the car and since he's not usually around in the middle of the afternoon, they assumed it was me.

I tell him whenever the neighbors yell things at me, but he doesn't seem to care when "hola, güera" is what they say. But NOW he cares. I believe "that's so annoying!" were his words. It won't change things but it makes me feel a little better that he understands.

[Interlude]

This morning we returned from our run to find a huge military truck parked in our lot. We had to park on the street and as we approached we saw several men in camouflage and at least a couple weapons (or maybe that was my imagination). Everything in the loaded truck was wrapped with cardboard, and at least six military men were running these packages up the stairs of the building opposite ours.

"Looks like someone's moving in."

I joked with Ibis that he should join the military so the next time we move, we can have our minions do all the heavy lifting.

After Ibis left for work, the truck drove away, empty. Within ten minutes another truck arrived, just as full as the first, and more men ran the things upstairs. The condos aren't very big so I'm a little curious how they're fitting everything inside, but more importantly, my overly active imagination has come up with all kinds of things that could happen once the new neighbors move in.

Because paranoia is more fun when it's shared, here's a couple of the scenarios I've come up with:

(Oh, before I continue I should point out that we have drug dealers living on the first floor of our building. I mention them here and there and lest anyone think I'm kidding, they really are dealers. They don't look scary or anything and we sometimes say hello when we see them, but still, drug dealers. Ok, carry on.)

1) At some point in the near future there will be a shoot out between the newly arrived military neighbors and the dealers. When I shared this idea with Ibis, I said it's a good thing our building is concrete.

His response: "Bazookas can shoot through concrete."

Mine: "Then it's a good thing we live on the fourth floor."

Which leads to scenario number...

2) The dealers will put out a hit on the new neighbors in the top floor condo facing downtown, but will neglect to mention which building. Yes, that would be us.

Or...

3) The newly arrived military people will scare away the drug dealers and there will be peace on earth.

I know which one I should focus on, but really, I'm a writer with a crazy imagination. What else am I supposed to think?

23 comments:

lostgirl said...

Wow... You just can't make this stuff up.. You could totally write a book about that, you know? It would be totally awesome. I'd read it.

Ibis is such a big help with the bazooka comment.. LOL

And now since I have an overactive writers imagination too.. anytime you're going to be gone for any length of time I expect to be informed in triplicate so I don't worry about you. :D

Melanie Avila said...

LG, I promise not to stay away for too long. Except for my two trips coming up in a couple weeks. ;)

And, I have written a book about all this! It doesn't include the past six months, but that's what sequels are for, right? I plan to tackle the edits as soon as I return from the states.

Aimless Writer said...

Perhaps they're turning it into military housing? (do they have that in Mexico?)

Zoe Winters said...

That writer imagination gets us in trouble sometimes, lol.

Sassee B said...

Okay, that is funny. (I mean really, it isn't, but at the same time, it really is.)

You know what it actually sounds like? It sounds like the start of the novel.

"All was peaceful in our little apartment building until the day the Mexican military moved in and discovered the drug dealers living on the first floor..."

spyscribbler said...

Oh, that's hilarious! It's like firemen. They stick close. One needs something, they all come help move. When did we become such a you-must-do-everything-all-by-yourself society?

WendyCinNYC said...

"Hola guera" is a hell of a lot better than "hola, gorda," no?

I can't say that I have any drug dealers as neighbors, but my high school classmate's dad got busted for growing pot in his basement, and they lived a street over. Ok, that's not nearly as exciting.

hqodf said...

I vote for #3.
:)

Turkey Lurkey said...

LMAO!!! I typed the word verification into that other post.

Melanie Avila said...

Aimless, our friends actually own that unit and are renting it out. I'll have to get Ibis to get the scoop!

Melanie Avila said...

Zoe, yes. Yes it does.

Melanie Avila said...

Sassee, that's a great idea & I'm surprised I didn't think of it myself!

Melanie Avila said...

Spy, that's a good point, but something tells me these guys didn't volunteer to help him move. I don't think the tenants were even there.

Melanie Avila said...

Wendy, you made me snort, lol. :)

Melanie Avila said...

Turkey! OMG. I'm sitting here thinking who the F is hqodf? I'm trying to figure out if there's a code, if I should know it, if Jes is just messing with me... and it's YOU!

Too funny.

Janna Qualman said...

So my first thought was, are there scads of weapons wrapped up in cardboard, being "moved" into the condo?

And is "minions" a new favorite word of yours, or what? ;)

Melanie Avila said...

Janna, my first thought was drugs, even though it's the military. Weapons was a close second.

And yes. Would YOU like to be my minion? Bwah-ha-ha-ha-ha!

Robin said...

Sometimes, when I walk through a spanish neighborhood, they yell out, "Hey, you horrible little troll!" I wonder what that means?
I think #3 will happen. Tell Ibis to ixne on the azookabe okesje.

Melanie Avila said...

Robin, lol!

Yeah, he's not the most reassuring sometimes...

ac said...

Oh! I learned a new word. Güera. Although I'm Puerto Rican, I don't know if I can pronounce it.

Ask your husband what brunette is in Spanish.

Melanie Avila said...

AC, he says it's morena(o). Nothing slang, apparently.

Güera is pronounced where+a, more or less.

ac said...

We say "negro" but that is really black, not brown.

We don't use "moreno" for hair color, but rather to refer to a black person. It's not a derogatory term (for those who are wondering)

auria

Melanie Avila said...

Yeah, here it's just moreno. Sounds weird to me, but we don't exactly refer to people by their skin color in the US.