Friday, March 21, 2008

What a Crybaby

Everyone throws a little pity party now and then. A quiet afternoon where you wallow in whatever misery has wronged you this time, a drunken night with friends to help you forget your sadness, a week in bed watching old Friends episodes (that Joey cracks me up every time). Some people may even write in a journal so they can get the icky feelings out and get on with their day.

But have you ever put all those mopey, waaaaaaaaa, my life sucks thoughts into an official document for the US government? Didn't think so.

Next month Ibis has to return to Ciudad Juarez for the second of two immigration appointments. The interview this month was all about him; this one will be all about me and why I'm better off living in the US. We've worked with our lawyer for several months, documenting every random thing I can think of that has made my life difficult. I don't get into a lot of those things in this blog, but there are plenty. I've sent her emails at all hours of the day, filled with one more obscure thing that came to me while sleeping. (The latest was that we don't have regular mail service and half the letters/cards people have sent never arrive.)

I consider myself an upbeat, optimistic person, and whenever I catch myself wallowing I try to remind myself that there are others much worse off than me. So to see all my gripes bulleted over nine pages almost made me laugh. "What a wimp!" I thought. "Is this what I've become?" I recognize that it's all true but still, who goes and writes their complaints in a list? Besides Heather Mills anyway.

The meeting isn't until April 17th so we still have plenty of anxious waiting ahead of us. In the meantime I finally made contact with my friends and made plans for several different things over the next week. Then I have another friend coming in three weeks. Lots of things to look forward to.

Ibis has tomorrow off and we're taking some hotel guests to the beach, then going to dinner with my friends, so I won't be posting tomorrow. For all of you buried in snow, I'm sorry. :) And Happy Good Friday.


TheElementary said...

Hi- It's Dibley from Absolute Write.
I'm curious about your blog for the immigration reasons. My husband and I were separated for fourteen months after marriage so I could get a visa to the US. If it failed, I don't know where we would have gone. All kinds of thoughts run through your head, though. It's not easy to give up a country like that. I'm sure that yours will run smoothly. I'll be thinking of you.

Melanie Avila said...

Thanks Dibley. Yeah, it's really stressful not knowing what will happen. Every time I start to get excited that we could be home in a couple months I catch myself and counter it with a reminder that he may not be approved. "Nothing's guaranteed" has become a common phrase.

I couldn't imagine being separated that long. I know other couples who've gone through what you did and I don't think I could do it.

Ed Pahule said...

Buried in snow is right. We're having what might be the heaviest snowfall of the season. This is Spring?

And maybe I haven't been following this very closely, but YOU have to explain why YOU want to leave the country? Aren't YOU a U.S. citizen?

Capt Gary Hooyenga said...

OK, I'll buy some towels. Can I come down and suffer a little with you. Snowing so maybe were crying ourselves.

Melanie Avila said...

Ed, I probably haven't fully explained. My husband is facing a ten-year ban from the US due to certain laws. This next meeting is me explaining why it would be too hard for me, as his supportive wife, to live outside the US for that long. I can go back whenever I want but this helps him return. They call it the crying wife letter - nice, eh?

Anonymous said...

Just to add my two cents...

I'm sure you've already thought of this, but remember to talk about leaving the world you know and understand behind. Your career, family, friends, etc. Even entertaining the thought of giving that up for a short period of time is a testiment to how much you love your husband!

Katie (aka Kadea) :)

Barrie said...

A crying wife letter?? Who comes up with these terms? Hmmm....although what would be better....the despondent spouse missive? (It's an alliteration kind of day for me!)